


That Wasn't Supposed to Happen

by megsblackfire



Category: Overwatch (Video Game)
Genre: Almost the whole cast, Comfort, Fluff, Implied Relationships, Shenanigans, fur-babies, mild body horror
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-08-24
Updated: 2016-08-30
Packaged: 2018-08-10 16:56:03
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 8,300
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7853386
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/megsblackfire/pseuds/megsblackfire
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>When Winston said that he had a new way to incapacitate enemy targets, no one was expecting it to go about quite like this. How were Hanzo and Reaper supposed to know that their new feline companions were anything other than what they looked like?</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Oops

McCree did his best not to frown too loudly as he eyed the new gun Winston set out for them. “I ain’t usually one to rain on people’s parade, big guy, but uh, gotta say; don’t think transformations are strictly possible.”

“It’s a prototype, McCree,” Winston huffed as everyone present; the only ones missing were Hanzo and Reaper, one because he just got back from a mission and the other because he couldn’t be assed to show up; gathered curiously around the weapon. “If it helps us make captures easier, it will be worth it.”

“Well, what are we waiting for then?” Junkrat cackled before he leaped forward and grabbed the gun. “Let’s give it a go!”

“Jamison, put that down,” Solder: 76 groaned, rubbing at the space between his eyebrows with one hand and reached for the gun with the other.

“Not on your life!” Jamison cackled as he hobble-ran away from 76’s reaching hand. “Come on! Give me something to shoot! I wanna see what this baby can do!”

“Jamison, really; let’s not play with the experimental tech,” McCree sighed as he moved to give the much older agent a hand.

“No!” Junkrat squealed as McCree and 76 managed to get a hold of him and the gun. “Come on! It’s just a bit of fu-.”

Whatever he was about to say was cut off by the gun going off in his hand. McCree and 76 shouted in alarm before a thick fog of smoke enveloped all three of them. The others coughed as the smoke dissipated, only to gasp in shock.

“Oh no,” Angela covered her mouth.

“Grab them!” Lena shouted.

McCree and 76 bolted for the door, leaving Junkrat to hobble on two good legs out of four behind them. The door to the lab opened as they approached and they scampered out. Junkrat was easily caught by Roadhog, who held the struggling, unhappy bundle against his chest.

“This is not good,” Winston groaned. “We should be able to catch them.”

Hana turned to glare at him. “Uh, Winston, gotta ask; have you ever even TRIED to wrangle cats before?” she demanded. 

“They’ll head for those they trust the most,” Winston replied. “We just need to figure out who that would be.”

* * *

 

Hanzo glanced up as he heard the door to the dining area open. He lifted an eyebrow in amusement as a cat came streaking in, sliding on the linoleum floor. It let out a pathetic mewl as it slid, three good paws digging into the floor while the stump of the left front leg wiggled desperately. Hanzo got to his feet and crouched down, holding his hand out.

“Here, puss-puss,” he crooned.

The cat paused and turned to look at him. Bright yellow eyes watched him from around thick, rex-textured brown-tabby fur. The stubby manx-tail flicked slowly before it slowly padded towards him. It sniffed at his fingers before happily rubbing under them with a loud purr.

“Well, aren’t you friendly,” Hanzo chuckled as he carefully scooped the well-fed cat up. “How did you even get into the base, kitten?”

The cat purred up at him, bright eyes gleaming out of its adorable face. Hanzo shook his head in amusement as he headed to the kitchenette. He’d always had a soft spot for animals, even if most people didn’t think it was possible. He didn’t have an issue killing people, but he coddled just about any animal that sidled up to him.

“Let’s see,” he mused as he opened a cupboard and searched for something to feed the cat. “Hmm, how do you feel about salmon?”

The cat let out a curious mew in his arms as Hanzo pulled a can of flaked salmon out of the cupboard. He set the cat on the counter and cracked the can open, draining the water out in the sink. He dumped the salmon into a bowl and put it down in front of the cat.

It sniffed at the salmon before eagerly digging in. Hanzo chuckled at the sight; cats and fish were always a match made in heaven. He reached out and scratched behind the cat’s rather chewed up ears.

“For such a well-fed cat, you look rather rough, kitten,” he crooned. “What sort of life have you been living?”

The cat purred but of course didn’t answer him. It lifted its head out of the bowl once it was done and licked its lips clean. It stepped over the bowl and rubbed against Hanzo’s chest, purring happily.

“Affectionate, aren’t you, kitten?” Hanzo chuckled as he scratched under the cat’s jaw. “Come on; best get you hidden before anyone asks about you.”

There was a rather strict “no pets allowed” rule on base, but if no one found out about Hanzo’s unexpected guest, they couldn’t get mad at him. He just had to hold onto the cat long enough to figure out if it was micro-chipped or not and try to get it back to whoever owned the affectionate feline. He was certain that whoever owned him would miss the little darling.

He scooped the cat up and tucked it under part of his shirt, creating a small barrier so that it wouldn’t be spotted right away. The cat blinked up at him and let out a curious mew as Hanzo started walking.

“Hush, kitten,” he chuckled as he left the dining area. “One more sound and we will be caught. You’ll be dumped out in the cold like an unwanted stray. We don’t want that now, do we?”

He swore the cat shook its head, but he couldn’t be sure. Amused, Hanzo continued on to his room, ducking inside when he thought he heard Lucio and Hana coming down the hallway. He set the cat down and gave it a gentle push with his foot towards the bed as he heard the footsteps stop outside his door.

“Ya, like Hanzo’s totally hiding him in his room,” Hana grumbled.

“Didn’t say that; just going to see if he’s seen him,” Lucio huffed.

Hanzo lifted an eyebrow as the pair knocked on his door. He waited for the cat to slip under his bed before he answered.

“Yes?”

“Hey, Hanzo,” Lucio waved. “Um, have you seen McCree around?”

Hanzo lifted an eyebrow at the two. “Wasn’t he supposed to be with you for a display of Winston’s new gun?” he asked.

“Um, yah, well, he sort of bolted? Long story; just let us know if you see him,” Lucio rubbed the back of his head.

“I will,” Hanzo promised before he closed the door.

He shook his head as he headed for his bed. The cat jumped up as soon as he sat down, blinking up at him.

“I don’t know how he manages to get himself into so much trouble,” Hanzo clucked his tongue as he scratched behind the cat’s ears. “Honestly, he’s a full-grown man that acts like a child. Can’t cook properly, doesn’t clean his room, I don’t even think he bathes; can you believe that, kitten? How can someone not enjoy a good bath?”

The cat purred as he continued scratching behind its ears. Hanzo reached out to touch the stump of the left front leg, clucking his tongue unhappily at the feeling. Poor thing; probably got it caught in a trap when it was young.

“Poor kitten,” he crooned before he reached for his phone. “I think I have a laser pointer somewhere on this.”

The cat gave him a look that he could have sworn was annoyance. He lifted an eyebrow as he brought the app up and turned it on. He circled the red dot on the floor and the cat immediately zeroed in on it. It crouched, back end wiggling in the air before it pounced. Hanzo moved the dot away seconds before the cat landed and it chased after it, batting and trying to catch the elusive dot with its one paw.

Hanzo laughed softly as he made the cat run the length of his room after the dot, recording the whole thing. This was always hilarious; it never got old watching animals chase after laser pointers. The sheer zeal of their “hunting” was enough to make even the biggest grump smile, Hanzo included.

* * *

 

Reaper felt something brush past his leg as he opened the door to his room. He watched a streak of white fur dart across his floor and immediately scale his bookshelf, crouching on the highest shelf. He let out a low chuckle of amusement at the cat that was currently arching its back and hissing furiously at him.

Well, this certainly wasn’t what he was expecting when he agreed to work with Overwatch. He closed the door behind him, locking it to make sure that no one was going to disturb him, and strode over to the cat. It hissed at him as he approached, fluffing its whip-like tail out as Reaper reached up to grab it.

“Good luck scratching through Kevlar, kitty,” he taunted.

The cat lashed out, but the claws bounced harmlessly off of his glove. He scruffed the ragged old cat, holding it still as its eyes widened. It slowly slumped against the shelf, tail flicking slowly as it watched him with familiar blue eyes.

“There we are,” Reaper clucked as he scooped the cat up and cradled it against his chest. “Now how did an old tom like you even get into the base? They don’t exactly let pets in, the grouchy lot.”

He scratched slowly behind the cat’s ears, enjoying the soft purrs that rose from the cat’s chest. He hummed in thought as the cat tipped its head around, moving Reaper’s claws down between its shoulders. It let out a long mewl of contentment as he scratched over the strong muscles, sinking bodily against him.

“Hmm, what am I going to do with you, old tom?” Reaper chuckled.

The knock on his door was annoying, but he moved to answer it, tucking the old white tom against his chest. The tom snuggled into him, purring softly as it turned its head towards the door, looking like an elegant little beast looking down from its black throne.

“Yes?” he growled as he opened the door.

“Hi, Gabriel, sorry to bother you,” Angela smiled sweetly at him, “but I was wondering if…oh! You found him!”

She immediately reached for the cat and Reaper moved back. “Him?” Reaper asked as the cat bristled in his arms. “Hmm, whatever are you doing with such an old tomcat, doctor?”

“He needs his medication,” Angela said a little too quickly. “He’s very sick. Hana found him wandering around base and brought him in.”

“Oh?” Reaper asked as he stroked a hand over the cat’s arched back. “He doesn’t look happy to see you. I think you’re lying to me, doctor.”

“Gabriel, please,” Angela sighed. “You don’t….”

“I’m keeping him,” Reaper said as he stepped back to let the door closed. “Tell Hana I’m so sorry about her kitty but he’ll be much happier with someone that isn’t going to stick him full of needles.”

Angela’s shout was cut off by his door shutting and him audibly locking the door. The old tom wiggled out of his arms and jumped to the ground, stalking over to the corner. He sat there with his tail curled over his paws, head lowered to growl at the door. Reaper lifted an eyebrow behind his mask.

“Cats don’t growl,” he said.

The cat looked at him with those familiar blue eyes and let out another low growl. The tail started flicking angrily back and forth and Gabriel let out a low chuckle.

“Someone is a pissy kitty,” he teased as he went looking for his feather duster.

A few modifications would turn it into the perfect cat toy to keep his friend from tearing everything to shreds. He sat down on the ground with the improvised toy, wiggling it back and forth to get the tomcat’s attention. The insulted look the cat gave him had him laughing.

“Oh, come now; it’s not that ugly,” he chuckled as he looked at the shredded feather duster. “Don’t you want to play, kitty?”

The cat stalked over to him, head lowered. A snarl played across the scarred white muzzle before he reached out to smack the fluffy toy. Reaper smirked as the cat froze, looking from its paw to the toy before it slapped the toy again. It wiggled tauntingly and then the cat started boxing the toy, rearing onto his hind legs to bat with his paws splayed and pretty white and pink claws extended.

Just as the cat bit the fluffy part and tried to tear it off, a mouse chose that moment to poke its nose out from under the bookshelf. The tomcat froze, crooked tail stiff as it zeroed in on the mouse. The mouse moved out further, pausing to wash over its ears. The tomcat lowered itself slowly to its paws, tail and haunches wiggling slowly before it charged forward.

The mouse scampered, but the tomcat gave chase. He yowled in outrage, chasing the mouse around most of Reaper’s room before managing to bat it onto its back. The tomcat skid to a stop, twisting around to leap on the stunned rodent. Reaper grinned as the cat bit down into the mouse and gave it a rough shake.

The cat sat up proudly, the dead mouse dangling from its jaws. Blood dripped quietly to the floor and Reaper nodded his head in approval.

“That’s all yours, kitty,” he chuckled.

The cat padded forward and jumped onto Reaper’s lap, curling up to start eating its kill. Reaper ran his claws over the cat’s back, smiling as blood stained across his pantleg.

“This is the start of a beautiful friendship,” he teased.

One scarred ear flicked back towards him before annoyed blue eyes turned to regard him. A pink tongue lapped blood off of the cat’s mouth. The cat let out a low purr before returning to his meal.

Reaper smirked as he heard something shifting around in the vents. He glanced at the vent and pulled his shotgun out. He carefully covered the cat’s delicate ears before he fired a warning shot just above the vent.

“Piss off,” he called.

Whomever was crawling around in the vent squealed and scrambled away. He chuckled as he put his shotgun down and returned to showering the white tomcat with affection.

* * *

 

“So we don’t know where McCree is and Gabriel’s holding Jack hostage,” Angela sighed and rubbed her eyes.

“Well, at least we have Junkrat,” Lena frowned at the orange tabby currently curled up on Roadhog’s lap. “How long is this thing supposed to last?”

“One hour,” Winston snorted. “But since the gun exploded, I can’t give an accurate duration.”

“So…now what?” Hana demanded from where she was curled up on Ana’s lap.

She was still shaken from having Reaper shoot at her for trying to get video evidence of what he was doing to Jack. From what she could tell, he hadn’t actually hurt him and was openly affectionate with what he thought was nothing more than an old white tomcat. It was strangely endearing if a little unsettling.

“Now we wait for the effects of the gun to wear off,” Winston sighed.

“And hope that McCree didn’t go curl up somewhere small,” Lucio grimaced.

“And that Gabriel doesn’t kill Jack,” Ana shook her head. “How do we even end up in these situations?”

There was a resounding murmur of “no idea” as everyone present shrugged.


	2. Um, hi?

Hanzo did his best not to snicker as he filmed his feline companion stare at the bathtub full of water. The rex-furred cat seemed utterly transfixed by the bubbles, reaching out to bat at them from his safe spot on the toilet lid. Hanzo had made sure to keep his three-legged friend away from the edge of the tub, worried that his attempts to play with the bubbles would result in him falling in and hurting himself.

He stopped filming and put his phone on the sink. “You are a silly little thing, kitten,” he chuckled as he removed his bathrobe. “So curious for a cat your age.”

The cat turned to watch him, stubby tail flicking slightly against his rump as Hanzo lowered himself into the tub. He let out a long sigh of contentment before he pulled the scarf out of his hair and dropped it beside the tub. The cat laid down and pressed his head against the toilet seat, yellow eyes bright and curious as Hanzo started scrubbing at his skin.

“You have a tongue to clean yourself,” Hanzo chuckled as he gave the cat a fond smile. “I am not so fortunate.”

The cat let out a soft “purrow” before licking his paw, almost as if he were agreeing with Hanzo’s statement. Hanzo chuckled at the sight, happy with his new companion. He was surprised that Genji hadn’t immediately come kicking down his door when he sent him the video of the cat climbing his dresser in hopes of catching the laser pointer. Usually, his brother was anywhere there were cats.

He hummed in thought as he cleaned himself, not overly concerned with his brother’s absence. Perhaps he finally got over his adoration for cats to the point of hysterics. It would certainly be good for any felines’ nerves to not have Genji suddenly pounce on them and attempt to cuddle.

He finished cleaning himself and leaned back in the tub, enjoying the warmth that seeped into his bones. He heard the cat jump down from the toilet and glanced over at the side of the tub as one white paw appeared before the familiar sweet, brown face.

“You won’t like it if you fall in,” Hanzo warned.

The cat glanced at him before easily jumping onto the rim of the tub. He balanced there for a moment before flopping down into the water. Hanzo laughed as the cat started paddling through the bubbles, a look of utter contentment on his face.

“Well, I was wrong,” he mused. “Are you a Turkish Water Cat, by any chance?”

The cat emerged from the bubbles with a beautiful crown of soap on its brown head and Hanzo could have sworn he was grinning. He reached out and scratched under the cat’s chin, clicking his tongue affectionately as the cat carefully climbed up his arm to perch on his shoulders.

“Kitten,” he crooned as the cat rubbed against his jaw. “I’m going to be sad when you go home.”

The cat let out a low purr and settled contently under Hanzo’s wet hair.

* * *

 

“You can’t sleep on that pillow, kitty,” Reaper chuckled as he gently moved the cat off of his pillow. “The old undead man needs that for his back.”

The white tomcat let out a low growl before stalking to the pile of pillows at the head of the bed. He glared at Reaper, daring him to make him move as he settled down next to where Reaper’s head would rest. Reaper chuckled as he removed his mask, setting it down on the bedside table. The cat tensed, blue eyes widening as Reaper glanced at him.

“Yah, ain’t I an ugly fucker,” Reaper smiled with two of his many mouths. “Still want to sleep that close to this face, kitty? You never know when I might bite.”

He knew what he looked like; too many red eyes stretching across his face, a sunken pit of a nose when he could be assed to form it, and three mouths stretched across his jaw. His skin was a mess of healthy brown, decaying black, and sickening gray pigment. His teeth interlaced each other like some predatory nightmare, tucking neatly against black gums. The rest of him was no better; he was all eyes and mouths under the Kevlar. All the better to eat the souls of the dead and strike fear into anything that moved.

The cat didn’t move as Reaper laid down. Reaper gave the motion for the lights to turn out and the white tom shifted closer. He felt the pink nose press against his cheek before the cat tucked itself contently against his neck. Reaper felt his companion purring and smiled to himself.

“Yah, love you too,” he chuckled as he reached up to scratch the cat’s neck.

He let himself drift off, but it wasn’t really sleeping. He didn’t really sleep anymore. It was more of a strange limbo where he wasn’t awake but he wasn’t sleeping. It was enough to keep his mind sharp, but it was nowhere near as refreshing as a good night’s sleep.

When he heard strained whining in the middle of the night and felt something much larger than a cat pressing against his side, he was awake instantly. He reached out to comfort his tomcat, only to feel flesh where there should have been fur. He bolted upright, hissing as he watched what had been a white tomcat tumble limply onto his mattress and lay there panting.

“I thought those eyes were familiar,” Reaper growled as he watched a very naked Jack Morrison shakily get to his hands and knees.

Jack didn’t even have the decency to answer him. He heaved loudly through his nose, white hair damp against his head and neck as sweat rolled down his shoulders. Reaper narrowed his eyes, all the ones in his face, and waited for Jack to look at him.

“Care to tell me how the great Jack Morrison wound up as a skinny old tomcat?” he demanded.

Jack slowly lifted his head and stared unflinching into Reaper’s face. “Winston’s experimental gun exploded. Don’t know why he thought turning targets into cats was a good idea.”

“I should snap your neck,” Reaper growled as he reached out to wrap a hand around Jack’s neck. “Save me the trouble of killing you when you have that damn plasma rifle.”

“Wouldn’t blame you if you did,” Jack smiled sadly.

Reaper glared at the old man before he released his neck. “Why did you seek me out?” he asked softly. “You could have gone anywhere on base, but you came running to my room. Why?”

“Thought this was a safe place,” Jack shrugged his shoulders.

“I could have killed you; snapped your old, withered spine like a toothpick and devoured your soul,” Reaper snapped.

“But you didn’t,” Jack laughed. “You knew, didn’t you?”

Reaper bared his fangs at the old man. “I had a feeling,” he growled. “I don’t know too many things that have those baby blue eyes or would be stupid enough to growl when they aren’t a mutt.”

Jack smiled before he reached out slowly. Reaper narrowed his eyes at the hand, ready to bite if Jack did something he didn’t like. Jack’s palm rested against his cheek and the old man scooted closer.

“Gabriel,” Jack murmured.

“Gabriel is dead,” Reaper snapped on reflex.

“You’ll respond when anyone else calls you that, but you snarl when I do,” Jack chuckled.

“You do the same, Jack,” Reaper snarled.

He wasn’t leaning into the hand and he certainly didn’t reach up to cover the scarred knuckles with his taloned gloves. He didn’t start kissing the palm, feeling the callouses and the gouges taken out of the once strong hands. It was all a figment of Jack’s imagination.

“I could get used to it if my name is being said by you,” Jack smiled as he moved onto Reaper’s lap.

Reaper settled his claws on Jack’s hips before he closed his eyes. “We can’t get back what we had, Jack,” he said softly. “Those days are long gone.”

“Then maybe we should start fresh,” Jack chuckled. “I’m Jack Morrison, also known as Soldier: 76; I spent the last six years trying to find the people responsible for dismantling Overwatch and make them pay for what they did to the people I cared about.”

Gabriel let himself smile before he rested his forehead against Jack’s. “I’m Gabriel Reyes, also known as Reaper; I’ve spent the last six years hating myself and what I’ve become. I was brought back to life through a twisted medical experiment and now spend most of my day in excruciating pain as my cells die and regenerate constantly. When I can, I’ve been trying to get revenge on anyone that harmed Overwatch.”

Jack wrapped his arms slowly around Gabriel’s shoulders and hugged him close. “I think this is the start of a beautiful friendship,” he chuckled into Gabriel’s ear.

“Me too,” Gabriel let himself relax into Jack’s arms. “Me too.”

* * *

 

Hanzo woke in the middle of the night to the feeling of something larger than him pressing against his back. He tensed up, feeling someone’s warm breath against the nape of his neck. He tried to keep his breathing even as he braced himself for an attack, coiling the muscles in his chest in preparation to pounce.

He whipped around and grabbed the uninvited guest by the throat, snarling as he pressed the naked, hairy man down into the mattress. He heard a familiar gag beneath his fingers and whistled for the lights to turn on. He blinked down at McCree before tightening his grip on the other man’s throat.

“What are you doing in my room?” he growled. “And why are you naked?”

Wait a minute. Where was his kitten?

“Where’s the cat?” Hanzo demanded as he looked around desperately.

He had fallen asleep with the cat lying right beside him. He had been a fluffed up ball of fur after Hanzo had used the hair-dryer on him so he wasn’t dripping water onto his bed. He had taken pictures to share with Genji the next day and had started looking into how much the local vet clinic charged to look for micro-chips. Where was his kitten?

McCree smiled nervously before he lifted his right hand up towards his head. “Nyan?” he replied, making a motion that might have been meant to emulate a paw.

“What?” Hanzo blinked.

“Long story,” McCree coughed. “Can you let me sit up?”

Hanzo shifted back to let the hairy intruder sit up. He kept his guard up, not sure how someone as loud and obnoxious as McCree had managed to not only get in his room without him noticing, but also strip out of his clothing and crawl into bed with him on the side furthest from the door and against the damn wall. McCree ran his hand through his shaggy hair, which Hanzo noticed was unusually soft and poofy. Odd; he didn’t think McCree owned a hair-dryer let alone know how to use one.

“Okay, so Winston had this gun that he said would help us incapacitate targets without hurting them,” he said slowly. “Jamison grabbed it and started being an idiot, so 76 and I tried to take it back from him. Somehow, the damn thing exploded and turned the three of us into cats.”

“Do you think I would believe a story like that?” Hanzo demanded. “That is farfetched and outside the realm of possibility!”

“Says the man that shoots dragons at people from his bow,” McCree smirked as he propped his elbow on his knee and rested his chin in his hand.

Something about the fond smile made Hanzo’s face heat up. He looked away, reaching for his phone to call Genji. He didn’t care that it was late; his brother would be able to tell him what madness McCree was going on about. If he was lying, Hanzo was going to show him the error of his ways. Painfully.

“Do you know what time it is?” Genji whined as he answered his phone.

“Did McCree get turned into a cat?” Hanzo demanded, not giving his brother a chance to whine about anything else.

“Yes…how did you find out?” Genji demanded. He actually sounded shocked. “We were trying to keep it on the down-low so that Reaper didn’t murder Jack while he had him.”

“McCree is sitting on my bed,” Hanzo grit out. “Naked.”

Genji was silent before he started laughing. “Oh sweet dragon beards! That cat you kept sending me pictures of was McCree?!”

“You sent Genji pictures?!” McCree demanded. “Why would you do that to me?!”

“And videos,” Hanzo smirked nastily at McCree. “Particularly of you chasing the laser.”

McCree looked absolutely horrified by the revelation. Genji was still laughing, holding the phone far away from his face as he pounded on something solid. Hanzo hoped that it wasn’t Zenyatta’s shoulder.

“Sweet dragons, I’m going to let Angela know McCree’s fine,” he howled. “She’ll want to see him in the morning. I’ll get his clothes.”

“I’m half-tempted to kick him out with a towel,” Hanzo growled as he hung up.

He almost jumped out of his skin as McCree rubbed his head against Hanzo’s shoulder. He stared at the large man as if he had lost his mind; Hanzo was certain that he had. McCree glanced up at him with a sweet smile on his face and he let out a low purr.

“Wouldn’t mind if I got to keep being your kitten,” McCree smiled.

Hanzo felt his face and chest turn bright red before he forcefully kicked McCree off of his bed. He didn’t care what anyone said; he was not letting McCree stay in his room. Not if he was not going to respect personal boundaries and rub on him like he was his adorable feline. Which he most certainly was not! Kitten was a sweet-faced little darling with the most adorable white paws and the sweetest disposition; McCree was not any of those things!

“Aw, don’t be like that,” McCree pouted as he sat up. “You liked me when I was fluffy.”

“I liked what I thought was a lost cat!” Hanzo shouted as he reached behind him to whip a pillow at McCree’s head. “Not an oversized child pretending to be a cowboy.”

McCree pressed a hand over his hairy chest and let out a soft gasp of mock pain. “You wound me, darlin’.”

“I’m going to do much worse if you do that again,” Hanzo snapped.

There was a knock on the door and Hanzo scrambled to answer it. He almost pulled Genji into the room, using his brother as a shield between him and the hairy man that was looking at him fondly.

“Why is he staring at me like that?” Hanzo demanded in Japanese.

Genji turned to look at him and started giggling. “Dragon’s beard, brother,” he snickered. “You are so hopeless. He likes you~ He wants to hug you; he wants to kiss you~” he sang.

Hanzo felt his face grow even redder as he looked from his brother’s smug stance to the man staring at him from the floor. Hanzo slowly covered his face and took a step away from his brother.

“I am not drunk enough to deal with this,” he said miserably. “I need three oceans worth of sake to deal with this nonsense.”

Genji cackled as he dropped McCree’s clothing on his lap. “You two play nice now,” he teased before he zipped out of the room.

“Genji!” Hanzo shrieked after him before he dropped to the ground and rubbed the heels of his palms into his eyes. “What the fuck?”

“So…I’m still not allowed to snuggle?” McCree called as he pulled underwear and pants on. “Because your hair smells really nice and I would love to smell it all night.”

Hanzo, very uncharacteristically, lifted his hand and flipped McCree off. He was not drunk enough to deal with this insanity. Either that, or this was the weirdest fever dream he’d ever had.

At least the booming volume of McCree’s laugh was soothing for some strange reason. It wasn’t Kitten’s purr, but it was almost as good.

* * *

 

“So, I put some modifications onto the gun,” Winston said proudly as he patted his invention.

“It’s not going to turn people into cats again, is it?” Lena frowned. “Because that was a terrible idea, love.”

“I liked being fluffy!” Junkrat cackled.

Jack let out a soft snort as he rubbed his neck. Gabriel rested a hand on the small of his back for a moment, providing a source of comfort. There was no video evidence of the old white tomcat’s existence save for a few surveillance clips that showed him racing out of the lab and down the hallway only to vanish into Reaper’s room and never emerging.

McCree looked sheepishly at his feet. The videos Genji had posted of him acting like an idiot as a cat were still huge internet sensations. About the only good thing that came out of it for him was that Hanzo was more open to being affectionate with him. He still got a boot to the ass whenever he tried to be too friendly, but Hanzo didn’t push him away if he snuggled on the couch.

An additional video of three grown men chasing a laser-pointer around the recroom a day after the incident was also incredibly popular. Winston claimed it was residual instincts left over from their prolonged time spent as felines, but promised that they would go away. No one would confess who recorded and uploaded the video, but everyone suspected that one of the Shimadas was responsible. Trying to get them to admit to it had proved to be fruitless and everyone had given up when neither one budged in their profession of innocence.

Jack never admitted that he still salivated at the sight of a fat rodent. No one seemed to notice if McCree started licking his flesh hand absentmindedly. Junkrat was partial to more scratches around his ears, but no one was really comfortable with the noises he made to capitalize on the way to make him sit still.

“It doesn’t turn people into cats,” Winston soothed. “This is much better. I need a volunteer to take the shot and someone to be shot.”

“Will it hurt?” Lena asked.

“No more than Ana’s tranq gun,” Winston smiled.

Hanzo rubbed his neck. “I will be shot,” he volunteered. “It seems…only fair considering my absence last time. It would have saved us all some trouble if I had been present.”

“I’ll shoot,” Gabriel chuckled. “Always wanted to put a tranq dart in one of the dragons.”

Hanzo glared at Gabriel before he went to stand across the lab. Gabriel picked the gun up and after a few quick instructions from Winston, he had it cocked and loaded. He pointed at Hanzo and everyone scrambled out of the way. Hanzo squeezed his eyes shut before the sharp snap of a gun going off filled the room.

Smoke exploded around Gabriel and Hanzo yelped loudly from across the room as smoke engulfed him. Everyone coughed and waved the smoke aside, squinting to see what had happened. There was an audible clatter of the gun falling to the ground before two very loud, very angry growls filled the room.

Where Gabriel had been standing was a very angry Doberman Pincher with way too many red eyes across its face and what looked like three gaping maws around its snout. The short black fur bristled along his back as he took a threatening step forward, exposing all of his misshapen teeth. All across his black body, red eyes opened and closed and innumerable maws gnashed razor-sharp teeth.

Across the room, a black and white Shiba Inu was growling where Hanzo had been standing. The dog had a distinctive beard coloration across his jaw and what looked like blue fur along its left leg. He was an incredibly fluffy dog and looked even fluffier with his fur bristled in outrage.

If Gabriel looked intimidating and unnatural, Hanzo looked adorable and huggable.

“Stop turning people into animals!” Hana shrieked. “What is wrong with you?!”

“Dogs are much easier to handle,” Winston grumbled as he pushed his glasses up his nose.

Gabriel snapped his jaws and made to lunge at Winston. Easier to handle his ass!

“Gabe, no!” Jack shouted as he rushed forward.

He wrapped his arms around Gabriel’s chest and held him close, scratching insistently under his jaw. Gabriel’s stubby tail wagged before he sat down with a whine, looking at Jack sadly.

“Hanzo! No! Stay!” Genji laughed as he hurried over to where his brother had tried to bolt for the exit.

Hanzo paused, glared at Genji, and darted around him. He charged headlong for McCree and hid behind his leg, growling at Genji when his brother fell over laughing.

“Aw, don’t mind him,” McCree smiled as he crouched down to scratch Hanzo’s fluffy cheeks. “He’s just sore he’s not as adorable as his brother.”

Hanzo glared at McCree before leaning forward and giving him the sloppiest dog-kiss he could manage. McCree fell backwards with a laugh, trying to push away the sudden onslaught of sloppy kisses as Hanzo pounced on him. The room dissolved into laughter that turned into a loud scream of shock from Hana and Lucio as Gabriel tried to join in on the fun.

One look at the three black, whip-like tongues that left his gaping maws was enough to make everyone sick. Jack, however, accepted the kisses with a loud laugh, hugging Gabriel close while covering Gabriel’s snout in kisses.

Once the gun’s affect wore off, Winston wasn’t allowed to make weapons that turned people into animals ever again. Athena was allowed to zap him if he ever tried. Every other weekend, there was a loud yelp of pain from the lab and a stern voice telling Winston to stop trying to turn everyone into animals.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> And that's the end. 
> 
> Although, to be fair, I'm half-tempted to write the chapters from McCree and Jack's perspective to let you know what they were thinking the whole time. And maybe have a chapter dedicated to the antics of the doggies. We'll see what happens.


	3. Woof

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So I caved and wrote the boys as dogs. Enjoy your fluff. I know McCree does.

The stick went sailing across the courtyard and Gabriel happily chased after it. His bark boomed across the open space, drawing laughter from everyone watching. He grabbed the stick, twisting it around between his three maws so that it was sitting comfortably in his muzzle. He turned his head back towards Jack, nubby tail wagging happily.

“Bring it here, Gabe,” Jack called, patting his knees. “I’ll throw it again.”

Gabriel charged back towards Jack, red eyes narrowing mischievously as he approached. Jack had all of three seconds to realize that Gabriel was not going to drop the stick at his feet again before Gabriel shot past him. The black and red Doberman Pincher dropped onto his front legs, wagging his whole backend as he barked around the stick. Jack let out a groan and tried to grab the stick.

“I’m too old for this, Gabe,” he scolded.

Gabriel’s red eyes crinkled into a cruel smirk and the maws across his shoulders let out soft, unnatural snickers. He darted away from Jack’s hands, barking at him as Hana and Lucio laughed from where they were sitting by the benches. Jack lunged, managing to catch Gabriel’s hips and pin him to the ground for a moment before the man-turned-dog started wiggling for freedom.

“Damn it, Gabriel!” Jack shouted as he was dragged along the ground behind Gabriel. “Drop the damn stick!”

McCree snickered into his hand as he scratched behind Hanzo’s ears. It was hilarious to watch Gabriel force Jack to work for his affection, darting around the old soldier with boundless puppy energy. McCree had no idea how Gabriel managed it; last time he checked, he was older than Jack was. 

Gabriel managed to wiggle his way to freedom and bounced away from Jack, dropping onto his front legs again with an excited bark. Jack groaned as he sat back on his heels, glaring at Gabriel as he ran his hand through his white hair.

“Ingrate,” Jack said.

Gabriel huffed and trotted over, wagging his tail as he dropped the stick at Jack’s feet and covered his face in creepy, sloppy kisses. Jack fell back with a shout of shock before it dissolved into laughter as he held Gabriel around the chest.

“You could join in you know,” McCree said as he scratched over Hanzo’s fluffy neck.

Hanzo let out a soft huff and rested his head on his paws. The bright blue ball that Genji had given him to play with was resting beside his paws. There was a small sheen of slobber on it, the only indication that Hanzo had happily played with the toy before everyone had wandered out into the courtyard. He’d gotten stage fright quickly and had clamped his jaws down around the toy. It had squeaked, a few people had laughed, and that was the end of it for Hanzo.

“No one’s judging you,” McCree soothed as he lifted Hanzo’s head and paws onto his lap. “They just want to see you enjoy yourself.”

Hanzo’s dark eyes flicked to him before he let out a soft whine. It was obvious to anyone with two braincells to rub together that Hanzo wanted to be playing as much as Gabriel was, but his pride was getting in the way. It was bad enough that he’d somehow got turned into a dog; he didn’t want an audience watching him run around like an idiot.

“Aw, is  _ oniichan _ being moody,” Genji teased as he dropped down beside McCree and started rubbing furiously at Hanzo’s hips. “Who’s a silly boy?”

“He’ll bite you,” McCree warned as Hanzo turned to growl at his brother. “Already nipped at Hana when she tried to give him a biscuit.”

“Just gotta find the sweet spot,” Genji cackled as he moved his hands over Hanzo’s fluffy belly and rubbed right below his ribs. Hanzo’s foot started kicking and he let out a long whine of contentment. “There we are.”

“He’s gunna bite you,” McCree chuckled as he watched murder bleed into Hanzo’s dark eyes. 

“Nah, he wou- AH!” Genji yelped as Hanzo twisted around to bite him. “That’s not nice, Hanzo!”

Hanzo stood baring his teeth at his brother, fur fluffed up indignantly. McCree laughed and reached out to ruffle the fur on Hanzo’s head.

“Come on, Hanzo; let’s see if we can’t find a quieter place to relax,” he said as he got to his feet.

Hanzo grabbed the ball and trotted after McCree, tail wagging happily. Genji whined something behind them and Hanzo paused to kick stones in Genji’s direction. McCree laughed at the sight, squatting down to roll Hanzo’s face between his hands.

“You are the sassiest little fluffball,” he teased.

Hanzo sat down and lifted his paw to smack McCree’s face. McCree laughed harder before he pulled Hanzo into a hug, burying his face in the black fur.

“Hanzo the Sassy,” he teased as Hanzo started wiggling to get free.

Hanzo bounced away from him, squeaking the ball between his teeth before he darted up the path to the cliffside. McCree hurried after him, holding his hat in place as the wind threatened to take it away. Hanzo was waiting at the top of the cliff for him, wagging his tail excitedly. He dropped the ball at McCree’s feet and barked, spinning around in a circle.

McCree picked the ball up and whipped it as hard as he could. Hanzo charged after it, ducking underneath it to spring up and catch it on the upward bounce. He came racing back over, running circles around McCree in his excitement.

“Slow down there before you go cartwheeling off the cliff,” McCree laughed as he sat down.

Hanzo tackled him, knocking him onto his back and dropping the slimy toy onto his face. McCree groaned in disgust as the toy rolled off of his cheek. He knew that Hanzo was smiling even without the wide, almost permanent puppy-smile that Shiba Inu had. Cheeky little shit.

“Off if you want me to throw it again,” he huffed.

Hanzo bounced off of him and sat patiently, his curled tail wagging happily against his back. McCree rolled himself to his feet and grabbed the ball. As he threw it, something much larger than Hanzo went streaking past. Gabriel caught the ball on the upward bounce and spun around, chewing carefully on the soft plastic as Hanzo bounced angrily in front of him.

“Sorry,” Jack apologized as he came to stand beside McCree. “He got mad at everyone staring at him and took off up here. He doesn’t listen very well.”

“Someone needs to train him better,” McCree teased.

“Says the man whose charge tried to bite two people,” Jack shot back.

“Hey, they’re the ones that kept treating him like a dog,” McCree lifted his hands. He glanced over at the two dogs and smirked. “Okay, that’s cute.”

“Pictures?” Jack asked as he pulled his phone out.

“Be fast,” McCree advised.

Jack snapped a few quick pictures as Hanzo licked over Gabriel’s cheek, wagging his tail as Gabriel returned the favour with one of his many long black tongues. He dropped the ball to the ground and Hanzo immediately snatched it up, wagging his tail before bounding back towards McCree. He froze midstep, staring at the black phone in Jack’s hand.

“We’ve been caught,” McCree stage whispered.

Hanzo bristled and growled, glaring at Jack as he pocketed his phone. Jack crossed his arms over his chest and smirked.

“Oh, I’m sorry; did I take a picture of you in a potentially embarrassing situation?” he asked. “At least you are still a dog and not back to your human self chasing after balls.”

Hanzo growled before he spat the ball at Jack’s feet and looked at him pointedly. Jack picked the slimy toy up and gave it a gentle lob. Gabriel and Hanzo chased after it and after a quick game of tug-of-war, Hanzo came trotting back with his prize. Gabriel bounded after him, barking happily as he dropped to his stomach at Jack’s feet and rolled over.

McCree threw the ball for Hanzo again as Jack knelt down to rub Gabriel’s belly. He let out a yelp as one of Gabriel’s mouths on his stomach opened to lick him, blinking in surprise as Gabriel whined.

“There is something so very wrong with having that many mouths,” McCree said as Hanzo sat beside him and squeaked his toy.

“Don’t you be insulting Gabriel,” Jack warned as he drew Gabriel up against his chest. “That’s my job.”

McCree laughed as he reached down to take the toy from Hanzo. Hanzo growled at him and bounded away, chewing on the toy so it squeaked. McCree rolled his eyes before he chased after Hanzo, laughing as he was easily outpaced.

Hanzo stopped short and McCree almost tripped over him. He rolled forward, easily going with the momentum, and grinned as he got to his feet. The grin died as he watched Hanzo tremble and close his eyes in pain. 

He heard bones popping and twisting and immediately pulled his serape off of his shoulder. “Easy,” McCree soothed as he wrapped the red length of cloth around Hanzo’s shoulders. “Don’t try to fight it.”

Hanzo whined as his fur began to recede. Twisting fingers clutched the serape tightly to him and the ball dropped to the grass as Hanzo coughed. McCree reached out and ran a hand soothingly over Hanzo’s shoulders as the transformation ended.

Hanzo smiled at him, a shy blush creeping across his face. “I suppose I have no reason to be modest when you’ve seen me running around as a dog and cleaning myself,” he murmured.

“You be as modest as you want, Hanzo,” McCree smiled as he patted Hanzo’s head. “Uh, sorry, still thinking dog.”

“I’m not quite as fluffy anymore,” Hanzo chuckled as he got to his feet, shifting the serape down to cover his hips. “And I still have to bite my brother.”

“Be a lot less effective without the pointy teeth,” McCree laughed as he got to his feet. “Hey, Reyes, you decent?”

“Already clothed,” Gabriel shouted back. “Only thing I’m missing is my mask.”

“Don’t think Jack minds,” McCree grinned as he headed for the other two. “Makes it easier for him to kiss you, WOAH!” 

He ducked the stick just in time to avoid it slamming into his face. Hanzo laughed at him and McCree didn’t bother hiding his smirk as he heard the sound of a particular ball squeaking in Hanzo’s hand.

If anyone noticed how close McCree and Hanzo were walking together back down towards the base, no one said anything. Hana made a comment about the colour of Gabriel’s beard, grinning as she called him an old man, but it quickly turned into a scream as he grabbed her and rubbed his beard all over her face.

Hanzo kept the toy his brother had given him, cleaning it repeatedly in the sink until it stopped smelling of dog-slobber. He claimed it was a stressball, something to help him keep his temper in check when he was alone, but McCree had caught him trying to chew on it a few times. It seemed to be the only latent instincts left over from his time as a dog and he was strangely fine with the pictures that surfaced of him being a fluffy, adorable ball of sass.

Gabriel couldn’t seem to get past tackling people in greeting. If someone got back from a mission and wasn’t paying attention, there was a good chance they’d end up on the floor with an excited Gabriel happily telling them that they were missed and he was happy they were back safe. It did nothing to ruin his bad boy reputation; he had torn the throat out of a Talon agent that had Hana cornered outside of her MEKA, reminding them all that he was still very dangerous and that he was choosing to see them as family. They just had to get used to being excitedly greeted by a six-foot-one wall of muscle that may or may not cover their faces in fatherly kisses.  

**Author's Note:**

> I read this Hanzo/Reader story a while back about the Hanzo somehow being turned into a cat and the idea just stuck with me.
> 
> Lots of fluff to be had. Nothing serious going on here.


End file.
